Don’t feel bad saying no when someone asks for help. Sometimes, saying no is the best thing you can do to help them.

“Saying yes isn’t always doing someone a favor,” said Michele Williams, professor of management and entrepreneurship in The University of Iowa Tippie College of Business. She said declining to help gives other people opportunities to learn new skills, showcase their existing skills in a new setting, broaden their skills, or make themselves more relevant in the organization.

Of course, saying no also helps you by keeping your workload to a reasonable level, though many people have a difficult time turning away requests for help no matter how busy they are. Williams said it’s human nature to want to help others, and we fear being disliked or seen as too aggressive if we say ‘no.’ Sometimes it’s easier to say yes than to deal with someone else’s drama. Sometimes we just feel guilty if we say no.

Williams suggests keeping a mental ‘saying no vault’ handy with phrases that you can use to tell someone you decline their request. “Thanks for asking, but I can’t because I’ve got these other deadlines.” “I’d love to join you, but I’m just overwhelmed.” “I’d love to, but the timing just isn’t right.”

You can also negotiate if the request seems intriguing. More information or a change in timing or location may make this opportunity a "heck yes!" for you.